I don't like to write reviews of mediocre movies.  They might be really bad, but that's not mediocre.  A movie has to strike me one way or the other for me to bother to write about it.  Watching movies is about my favorite hobby.  Movies serve as a window to the world allowing us to witness other lives and cultures, and maybe to escape our own lives for a little while.  Or some movies might just be eye candy, which is fine as long as they don't try to present themselves as something above eye candy (a good example of eye candy is the movie "Virtuosity" starring Denzel Washington, chocolate covered doodoo).  If a movie can portray a human story well, hoorah!  If it doesn't, then we need to know why.  Movie-making is a great art form and when that art form is invaded by substandard hacks who are allowed to invade our homes with their barrage of misjudgement, miscalculations, and mismanagement (is that a word?), we need to swat it down like a diseased fly.  The movie-watching consciousness of the western world has deteriorated somewhat, somewhat drastically in my opinion, over the last 20 years.  We get blasted by over-marketing and sold on cheap entertainment that doesn't live up to the tradition which movies originally established.  I could go on and on.  I like all kinds of movies.  There are all kinds of genres.  I like em all.  I'll write about em.  You can read about em and make up your own minds. 

I don't like pidgeonholing movies into specific genres but its especially helpful when you need to organize them.  I plan to add genres as I go along.  I don't like too vague of a genre so I'm gonna define a few of my own, with which I can form combinations, or even triple combinations :

• Comedy -- obvious what that is

• Action -- movies that get our blood pumping and let us root for the good guy, they give us a sense that all wrongs can be righted with a good ass-kicking (I wish that were true)

• Big-budget flicks -- stuff that surpasses the normal expenditure of 99% of all other movies out there.  Regardless if its a comedy, action, or romance, I will shuffle it into this genre because the philosophy behind all movies of this magnitude is relatively the same

• Art house -- or call em independent films.  Movies that are generally made without big house production money and attempt to make movies with a modicum of integrity

• Foreign ____ -- I won't just call a movie "foreign", but it will be "foreign: Norwegian", or "foreign: Japanese", followed by  subgenre,etc.

• Real-life -- stuff that is more or less realistic.  Like "Leaving Las Vegas" or "Micki and Maude"

• Subgenres -- some movies don't fall into any real category and I will define them with their own

• Highlander 2: The Quickening -- this movie has reserved the right to a genre all its own. 

Movies are ranked by this icon , the Lava Lamp.  Five lava lamps is the highest, no half lamps will be used. There can also be negative lava lamps or negative lava lamps to the nth power, like Highlander 2. 

Here are the reviews:

Cocktail ()

Highlander 2: The Quickening (negative¹⁰)

Battlefield Earth (negative⁹)

Pearl Harbor ()

Virtuosity ()